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Si parla spesso di adozione, questo bellissimo gesto d’amore, ma pochi conoscono l’esperienza di chi è stato adottato. A me fa piacere parlarne perché l’ho vissuta e la vivo in maniera molto serena, e, magari, posso aiutare chi vuole intraprendere questo “splendido viaggio”. Sono cresciuta con la mia famiglia adottiva in maniera molto tranquilla da questo punto di vista. Mi hanno sempre raccontato tutta la verità sin da piccola. Non ho mai avuto curiosità di fare domande, perché già sapevo. Questo, per me, è un valore aggiunto. Non avere paura di raccontarci la verità, tanto nel crescere la verità verrà fuori. Io mi sono sentita amata sin da subito da tutti. I miei genitori, i parenti, i vicini di casa, tutti mi hanno accettata e voluta sin da subito.
Il mio colore sicuramente tuttora spicca all’interno della famiglia, ma non mi aveva mai creato problemi. Ho iniziato a fare i conti con questa “diversità” a partire dalla prima elementare. Fino ad allora avevo vissuto la mia vita in una bellissima bolla, protetta. Ma affrontare un ambiente nuovo, pieno di sconosciuti non è stato facile. Ero l’unica bambina di colore in tutta la scuola. A sette anni non è facile dare spiegazioni o confrontarti con le domande scomode degli altri bambini. Ero sicuramente un bersaglio facile perché già partivo con una diversità evidente. 190 Eh sì! Lì, per la prima volta, ho avuto la sensazione e la conferma di essere diversa dagli altri e ho dovuto iniziare a fare i conti con la realtà. È importante creare un dialogo con il vostro “figlio di cuore”. In quei momenti si chiuderà… in quei momenti la diversità peserà moltissimo.
Non ho mai parlato di questo disagio con nessuno in quegli anni, tirando su una corazza che con il tempo mi ha portata a rifugiarmi nel cibo. Anche se sembra che vada tutto bene, che non ci siano problemi evidenti, indaga! Questo disagio esiste anche perché molte famiglie non preparano i bambini a queste possibili “diversità” che possono incontrare.
Esistono bambini di pancia e bambini di cuore, ma il concetto di famiglia non cambia. Un bambino di cuore può essere italiano seppur di un altro colore. Non dovrebbero esistere diversità, soprattutto tra bambini. Un colore, una nazionalità, una disabilità, o qualsiasi altro aspetto esteriore non possono fare la differenza. La diversità può solo arricchire la mia vita, la tua vita, la vita di tutti.
Melania Pericolini
