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Michela Murgia ha condiviso sui social il suo matrimonio Queer. Come aveva annunciato mesi fa, informandoci delle sue condizioni di salute, questi ultimi mesi della sua vita li avrebbe dedicati in primis ai suoi figli e poi alla sua famiglia non tradizionale, dunque alle battaglie di civiltà e progresso riguardanti il concetto stesso di famiglia.
Cosa significa "Queer"
"Queer" è un termine generico utilizzato per indicare coloro che non sono eterosessuali e/o non sono cisgender. È un termine della lingua inglese che tradizionalmente significava "eccentrico", "insolito".
Il racconto direttamente dalle parole di Michela Murgia
Qualche giorno fa io e Lorenzo ci siamo sposat3 civilmente. Lo abbiamo fatto “in articulo mortis” perché ogni giorno c’è una complicazione fisica diversa, entro ed esco dall’ospedale e ormai non diamo più niente per scontato. Lo abbiamo fatto controvoglia: se avessimo avuto un altro modo per garantirci i diritti a vicenda non saremmo mai ricorsi a uno strumento così patriarcale e limitato, che ci costringe a ridurre alla rappresentazione della coppia un’esperienza molto più ricca e forte, dove il numero 2 è il contrario di quello che siamo. Niente auguri, quindi, perché il rito che avremmo voluto ancora non esiste. Ma esisterà e vogliamo contribuire a farlo nascere. Tra qualche giorno nel giardino della casa ancora in trasloco daremo vita alla nostra idea di celebrazione della famiglia queer. Le nostre promesse non saranno quelle che siamo stat3 costrett3 a fare l’altro giorno. Vogliamo condividerlo a modo nostro e lo faremo da questo profilo, senza giornalist3 o media vari. Il nostro vissuto personale, come quello di tutt3, oggi è più politico che mai e se potessi lasciare un’eredità simbolica, vorrei fosse questa: un altro modello di relazione, uno in più per chi nella vita ha dovuto combattere sentendosi sempre qualcosa in meno.
Gli abiti bianchi per tutta la Queer family
Quando Maria Grazia Chiuri mi ha detto “voglio disegnarti l’abito da sposa” ho provato imbarazzo: non mi considero una sposa. Il fatto che tutt3 continuino a romanticizzare la questione e farci le congratulazioni non cambia la realtà: io e Lorenzo abbiamo firmato un contratto con lo Stato per avere diritti che non c’era altro modo per ottenere così rapidamente. Sappiamo che abbiamo fatto uso di un privilegio: mutuo, adozioni, agevolazioni fiscali, sono tutte cose che, se le chiedessimo ora, ci sarebbero concesse in quanto due e in quanto maschio e femmina, ma per questo abbiamo dovuto ricorrere allo strumento del binarismo eterosessuale come norma naturale dei rapporti, cioè quello contro cui ci siamo sempre battut3. “Vorrei rendere politico il nostro vissuto per mostrare che abbiamo trovato un altro modo per stare insieme, un modo che il governo vorrebbe ridurre a stranezza sociale da perseguitare e invece è già la vita normale di tante persone”. Maria Grazia Chiuri mi ha detto: ho capito perfettamente, dammi tempo e ti propongo una cosa. Tre giorni dopo mi ha mandato i bozzetti di una intera mini-collezione familiare che interpreta alla perfezione lo spirito queer del nostro stare insieme. Completamente bianca per tutti, de-sacralizza il colore nuziale, che cambia significato: il bianco è inclusivo, sintesi additiva di tutti i colori dello spettro. Nella collezione di cui ci ha fatto dono, realizzata ad hoc, ci sono solo pezzi intercambiabili, no gender, tra i quali ciascun ha scelto la combinazione che meglio esprimeva la sua identità. Sul mio vestito c’è un ricamo prezioso di perline: “God save the queer”, la stessa frase che appare sulla t-shirt personalizzata. Quel che siamo, multipli forti, è perfettamente rappresentato da questo incredibile discorso di tessuti e modelli, frutto della sensibilità creativa di una donna, un’amica, che ogni giorno mi dà lezioni di generosità, acume e professionalità.
E gli anelli?
Nessuna fede per lei e Lorenzo. Ma anelli chevalier in resina -che tutta la famiglia indossa- con rane, esseri che mutano forma e ambiente più volte nella vita e che possono essere considerati l'emblema del cambiamento stesso.
Da chi è composta la famiglia
Lorenzo, Claudia, Marco, Alessandro, Cinzia, oltre alle scrittrici Chiara Valerio e Chiara Tagliaferri, il cantante lirico Francesco Leone, Roberto Saviano, Nicola Lagioia, Paolo Repetti, Teresa Ciabatti.
*Le foto della gallery sono state scattate da Chiara Pasqualini e si trovano sulla pagina Instagram di Michela Murgia